perfection is impossible

ive been trying to think of something worth writting for the past few days to finally come back to the idea, that if given a great opportunity we blow it. simple in idea, but giant in reality. it almost comes back to regret, but is the fear we all have inside, the fact to have something perfect scares us, its too good to be true?? or is it? when asking 3 female's (taking note that it is only 3 i have asked) i asked if given the chance to have the "fairy tale" like that in the notebook, all three said yes. But when asked if they would trust a man who they bearly know after some odd years of no contact, if they would break off being married to another man, who they love, and would be happy with, 2/3 said no, and i think the 1/3 was lieing. lol. but really. would you give it wall up? no. of course not. so its not that we mess up the perfection, its that we are too scared to try, to scared to let go of what we have already gained.
so ask yourself. are you one of the 2/3rds?

i am.

figured, what the hell!?

so, i wrote this along time ago, about 3+ years, and thought id put it up, since i rarely do on myspace. be critical.


“perfect moment”

The days die down
The wind less fluttering,
Though I wish the stars
Away for a moment.
The air is cold
I feel you shiver,
I’ll bring you in close
Holding you tight
Wishing this to last forever,
But no one will accept
The time to stop still
Because the pulse of your heart
Is all I want to feel.
As time fly’s by
Still we’ll lay,
Till the sun
Turns to a shade.
In this perfect moment
As we are intertwined
Our lips touch,
A gasp of air
Our eyes meeting again
Almost like the first time
saying things we’ve never said
But peace is all we hear.
And we will live
In this perfect moment,
Eternity is mine my dear

lack of self content

i have become increasingly aware of my situation which i hate so much. So to push myself out of this relaxed state I am applying for the FJC transfer program. i feel i am being hypocritical, since i can distinctly remembering more than once saying someone should have the will power to push themselves even if there is no real need to. Sadly i must conciede defeat to my own hypocrasy and see if i can leave. dont get me wrong, i love my friends, but i hate these people who say they are my friends, but i believe 3 months away will help me so. not only that, but it would be to london, and if you know me then you know how much i want to go. so wish me luck.